Rich Bride, Poor Bride

Yes, 5th Feb was my last day up in the hill. And I have not look back since.

Partly its because I was bogged down with many other things, such as preparation for CNY, ROM and the trip.

After making about 3 trips down with the car packed to the brim, not only do I have to unload and unpack, I have to pack up things in my room to make room for the things that I brought down. Also, I forsee another round of packing AFTER I finish packing for the trip as there is no point keeping stuff for another year when i'm not around.

Funnily though, exhausting and tiring as it were, I'm not complaining. I find the act of packing up stuff very stress relieving, almost as it it re-energizes me as I unclutter my room. The act of packing up stuff to throw/give away is certainly very refreshing, perhaps, it reflects my need for a change as I prepare for a life changing month...

Anyway, the point is, I came across a list of things that I found on the internet long long time ago. Something about things that you should do in your life. I glanced through the list and I stopped at one.

"Be engaged at least six months before you married".

My heart dropped for a moment as I paused to think about the statement. "I'm only engaged for less than two months". The problem is, before I was reminded by the statement, I'd always thought that I was engaged for a very long time (which contributes to the issue on why I wanted to get married) because I always thought that I was proposed to seven years ago which I promptly accepted. Unfortunately, as years went by, I came to realized that the particular incident was not what I thought it was.

I know I'm being dramatic again, but drama is what makes this interesting...

Apparently, i am only "officially" engaged the moment he proposed at the beginning of this year. Which only leaves me two months to prepare before the registering of marriage. (And he wanders how come I expected it. Of course, otherwise, it will be no time to prepare! *roll eyes*). Logic plays a very important part in my life, hence the logistics of the whole thing was pretty logical.

Hence, all these time while I am thinking that I'm "engaged", I'm not. So, I got a pretty rude shock when I realized what being "officially engaged" means. Cause when it is official only I can start talking about making plans, money and many more issues. I told you I was banned from talking these stuff before the proposal. What to do, seven years of courtship and I cant discuss these kinda things and I'm only given two months to deal with it (Tell me how not to be mad about it? - I'm being dramatic, so read along...)

The sudden influx of information (bridal magazines, bridal forums, bridal websites, bridal this bridal that) sends me into this frenzy that I cannot control. Yes, I am only registering and not doing the actual ceremony yet, but you cant blame me cause apparently these are what soon-to-be-brides do (stick finger in mouth to gag).

Part of me wants to keep things as simple as possible purely on logistical issues. No money, no time and no planning. However, a very tiny part of me wants it to be magical. But I cannot even afford a new dress, let alone a photographer to take pictures. Suprise suprise, the desperate side of me actually wrote an email to a photograher practically begging him to do it for free.

Being engaged changed me as well. Obviously my topic of conversations has changed. I was talking to a cousin of mine (whom we barely exchanged meaningful conversation) about the issue of people adding their two cents of thoughts on our plans. "So what if its a marriage of convineance? So what if we're not ready for it? What can they do?" Which she proceeds to playfully slap me and said, "You are as stubborn as any one of our family." How true...

Well, dont worry so much about the statement (cause again, I have to remind you that I'm being dramatic and all). But then again, I found out something that makes me totally disgusted. I dont know which is worst, discovering the information or him looking at me and go, "Whats wrong with that?".

Funny how this post coincides with the start of my PMS week.

Happy Chinese New Years everyone!