Your Brain is 60% Female, 40% Male

Your brain is a healthy mix of male and female You are both sensitive and savvy Rational and reasonable, you tend to keep level headed But you also tend to wear your heart on your sleeve

What Gender Is Your Brain?

30/06/06

I have been told that I am a creature of habit some time back. Only then did I realize that it was true. Food-wise especially.
I had nasi lemak for lunch for a week and I am not sick of it. Neither did I force myself to it. In fact, I was looking forward to it!
Most of the time, if I like a certain food, I would find every opportunity to eat it. I do not like yearning for certain food. If I could afford it, I'll stuff myself until I get sick and tired of it so that I could look forward to another type of food that I could stuff myself silly next. HAHAHA sick eh? I like the feeling of having more than enough *burp* damn, now I feel sleepy.

Being perfect is a defect itself...

Today's forecast: Misty and gloomy.
This is the exact same spot that I took the picture yesterday. Talk about going to work on a cold cold morning!
I just watched “I not stupid 2”. So bloody true!
I borrowed it from my next door neighbour, she warned me that she too, cried while watching it. I remember replying, isn’t it a comedy? Nearly cried my eyes out man!
It is true, the way the movie portray the storyline.
I remembered a fwded email I received a couple a days ago. It is a snipet of a radio interview by a couple of Hong Kong DJs talking to a clueless 16-year old. 1 minute into the conversation, we found out that that girl just broke up with her bf of less than 2 months whom she had known via the internet and slept with after their 3rd date. The DJs were so furious that they practically yelled at her on air saying that they forsee that she will end up with a bleak future. And the best part is, the girl wasn’t even irrirated! She is totally clueless!
Makes me think that it is true that it is not easy to raise kids afterall. No matter what you do, there is no guaranteed or a black&white way to raise kids “perfectly”. Every family has its problem. There is no such thing as a “perfect” family. Being perfect is a defect itself.
We’ve been exposed to various western movies about teenage problems illustrating how a broken family raise teenage kids who are clueless or communication barrier between the generation gaps. Somehow, it doesn’t seem to relate better to us Asian than movies like “I not Stupid” or “Sepet” and such. It shows all problems in OUR culture and OUR belief in OUR environment. True to the core… I cannot emphasis enough how true these things were. Clueless 16-year olds? I’ve been there. I remember being so bloody desperate at one point of time where I keep count of all the boys I have known in my life! Parents not listening enough? I remember the tough time I had nearing my SPM. It was so dark, gloomy and I’ve never felt so detached. So much anger and hatred. Good for nothing youth hanging around with odd jobs? Hey, they are just to make ends meet! It is things like this that makes me wander, what if? It shows everyone what its like on the other side. I was never on the other side. I was always kept safe, and it made me rebel more. It is times like this that made me remember. Remembering what it could be like on the other side.
I remember her.

29/06/06

This is what i walk past by everyday to work. This picture is slightly gloomy cause its already 5pm when I took the picture. In the morning, its very misty and we can hardly see anything. In the afternoon, it it will be very bright and come night time the whole thing will be in shimerring lights. Most mornings when I walked past by, it always made me think about hoping to go there on of these days. But i never seems to find the time. And i'd always wander what it felt like to be there as a customer, a customer who is up here for a couple of days instead of a couple of years :)

Work today was alright. First half of the day wheeze past by but I was nodding off right after lunch. Luckily, he had something urgent and had to rush down halfway around 3pm. Phew!

Lost 2 of my skirts in our laundry when it was broken into 2 weeks ago. Just my luck that the thief stole only skirts (freaky!!) I think my brown skirt went missing but I cannot recall the other skirt! I dont remember... damn, really had too many clothes up here liao...

Guess its another day off early i guess. Wanted to rush back to watch the chinese series :P Hope to go back to KL over the weekend, but not too sure yet. Keeping my fingers crossed!

25/06/06

How does one stay happy?
By checking out early and forgetting about work.
There was suppose to be a few post up in the past weeks, but i noticed that it is always about the same thing and I am always whining about the same things. So since (yes, finally I also feel boring) its the same rantings and complains about the same thing, so I didnt manage to post lor.

But anyhow the week few by as I was having loads of fun. But this week on, the darkness looms again. This happen every 4th week. My month usually go like this:
1st & 2nd week - will try to check out by 5pm sharp and will usually come back to office to continue work/online at 8pm.
3rd week - will check out work by 6pm or 8pm (depending)
4th weel - is the week when I'm most hardworking... if you want me to work overtime, this would be the best week!

So go figure, it will be a cycle which tells my routine at work. After the 4th week (of working way past 5pm), it would be back to 1st week of checking out at 5pm. Hmm.. sounds like I have a schedule to go about too! I'm not only 9-5pm after all! Hahaha

And yup, this is the beginning of the 4th week. So that explains the sudden exhilaration I am felling right now after my big big boss dump me another "vague" workload! Since I had the whole week of overtime to look forward too, I have the time to work on it. Usually I would go black faced when I was asked to stay back on the 1st, 2nd & (especially!) 3rd week, but this week seems like a good time. I would have time to digest what is required without cursing away while looking at the clock saying 6:05pm. HAHAHHA

Oh well, looks like I have begin to accept my situation (work and social life!) :)

Money not enough...

I spent 3 separate nights having dinner and a good yakking session with 3 different girlfriends of mine for a good 3 hours each talking about the same thing = money.

1st Dinner
I finally found time to sit down with an ex-schoolmate of mine for dinner after she told me she would be leaving the company for Macau. She had a way better offer (more than triple my current salary!) doing the exact same thing she is doing here. She made me think about the possibility of working oversea. Is the grass really greener on the other side? All I know is that it sure would be a whole lot easier to take crap from bosses while getting a bigger and fatter paycheck.
Is it worth it? There are so many versions of the stories. What I am interested to do is to go over and to see for myself (first hand) how good it is. Afterall, if the prospect is so good, wouldnt it be worth 30k?
Of course, there are a lot more things that I have yet to think through... like leaving my parents and staying alone in a foreign country, and also that I lack operation experience.Is money never enough? All my life money played an important role in me. But if money is really that important, can I leave everything behind just to have more? Hey, looks like its not all about money afterall.

2nd Dinner
I spend another 3 hours with my next-door neighbour chatting over what it likes to live like our customers. What does it feels like to gamble away hundreds of thousands over a couple of hours? People always says that it is a lonely life with lots of cash. Like a tai-tai that only spend time dolling up herself and shopping to drown her sorrows on her husband's affair. Is it always like that? What about the loving couple who came for a stopover on their way around the world? The conversation also came to a point where we said that it was unfortunate of us to be born without model-like built and looks. So, we'll never be those 'escort' that get paid 5k for every winning game! (okay, I am totally ignoring the fact about the hanky-panky that may take place).

3rd Dinner
It was another 3 hours of pondering if1) tragedy strikes and my family is in dire need of cash, 2) I just had a huge argument with my bf and we broke up & 3) bosses is really a pain in the ass, AND a customer offers to pay a huge amount of money, under one condition of course (that I be his mistress-ler, what else?!), would I agree? So we both starts pondering on the pros and cons of the issue. Now, before u shake your head and said, never in a million years, my body is worth way more than that, there will always be other options, etc etc,... it is never only the lum sum.
These is what we came up with:
Pros
1) Of course, upmost important is to use the money to pay off whatever is burdening the family-ler
2) Lifetime expenses is being taken care of.
3) Live in a posh condominium overlooking a wonderful city skyline.
4) The only choice we have to make is whether its this or that, and not yes or no.

Cons:
1) The need to close both eyes shut (haha!)
2) The risk that you'll be dumped and will be back to square 1.
3) Reputation.
4) Again, ironically, the only choice we are allowed to make is whether its this or that, and not yes or no.

:)

I suddenly have this urge to believe that I could do whatever I want to do. That I could achieve whatever I wanted to get.

Yea right.

Excerpt - Life after 512

"...I began to tell myself to relax. Afterall, I am surounded by people, there shouldnt be any problem right? My breath became heavy and suddenly I realized I am having difficulty in breathing. I inhaled deeply and still I can hardly feel anything! Help! Can't they see that I am in trouble!?! I told myself that perhaps I should cool down and relax. I could feel the tightness in my chest. I can't breathe! What is happening!?!...
5th January 2002

08/06/06

As I already mentioned in my previous blog in Friendster, I am very easily convinced with gadgets that looks cool more than practical.
And I bought a rubber keyboard! It looks like a piece of black rubber and it is a completely functional keyboard. I admit, it wasnt very easy to type with, but then again, it attracts a lot of attention and it looks damn cool! Teamed with my small mouse, it saved loads of space! My phone (not in picture) doesnt seem to blend into the set-up, so may be looking out for a canggih-looking phone soon! The things I do to keep myself entertained at work! :P

Well, I'd like to think of it as a way to de-stress. It is enough that I am getting stupid stuff from bosses, at least I have a nice-looking office space (yes, albeit it being not user-friendly!). Too bad I didnt have a flat screen...

This week has been very stressful. And I admit the stress is self-induced. I spend most of the week stressing myself out thinking that my big big boss is gonna show up anytime in the office. It came to a point when I was too afraid to call the secretary to ask whether he is coming up or not. And yes, after all the waiting, he is up tomorrow. So, it will be earthquake day tomorrow onwards until the weekend is over for our office.

Story of our lives eh?

Blog-warming (soft launch!) :)

"Life is difficult, full of trials, sorrow and pain. But if you fall down, just stand up straight, be confident and say loudly and proudly, "TIU NA SING, who pushed me ah!?!"

Welcome to my new place!

The above was a fwd SMS i received a few days ago. And my first thought was, my sentiments exactly! Life may be tough, work may sucks, bosses may be ridiculous, but still, at the end of the day, it is up to oneself to see and accept it positively!

Decided to move the blog here so that at least I will be able to update it more often than only when I am down in KL. Hope to update my profile and load more pictures.

Post this up for now. Need to re-invent a couple of things. Perhaps will blog more later. Until then, this will be where I post my blogs from now. Enjoy!

01/06/2006

Testing testing... Looks like a comfortable place.
I'm looking for a place to move my blog :)