Bangkok (18-20 Sept 07)

And so, it was the beginning of a very short trip to Bangkok.

It was also my first time taking the KLIA Express, first time going to LCCT, first time flying AirAsia, first time traveling without makeup, and first time seeing the 1 litre restriction thing.


I was very worried about the printed confirmation email and was very jittery throughout the trip to Bangkok in fear that AirAsia screwed up and 1) was not allowed to fly and 2) was not allowed acocomodation.

Anyway, all went well and even my 102ml deodorant made it through the custom (though I do not recommend it)!

We arrived late at night to the hotel at Bangkok on Tuesday night (about 9:30pm) and were off to the Airport at Thursday, 3pm. Looking back, despite having very little time, we did manage to cover quite a number of places.

We went to Kao Shan Road (which is a “hub” for backpackers), Yaowarat Road (Chinatown), Floating Market (joined a half-day tour), Pratunam (a concentrated shopping area), Suan Lum night market (another great place for shopping), Snake & Elephant places (included in the tour), few more shopping malls, Correction Museum (along the street of our hotel), and passed by many temples.

I brought along my mum’s camera, and I tried (very hard!) do to the tourist-picture-taking thing. I mean, I like taking pictures, but I just don’t have the knack of taking every scene that I came across. Especially when it comes to food. By the time we finished the food, THEN only we’ll think of taking pictures. The food in Bangkok was absolutely MARVELOUS! There’s pork everywhere! Their street food is cheap and super tasty! Beef noodle and duck noodle, UMPH! The flavour of their duck noodle soup, is like our instant duck noodle mee, only 100 times better! Now imagine the cartoon characters, Tom & Jerry. Whenever they experience something nice, they close their eyes, body straighten, flipping their feet and off they fly… that’s exactly how I feel after tasting their beef noodle soup. I kid you not! Their mango dippings were a different world altogether! Basically, the less luxurious the settings, the better the food! These are the only few pathetic pictures that we managed to take…


We mostly travel using tuk-tuks and taxis. At any time of the day, their taxis and tuk-tuks are at abundance, hence traveling around is a no brainer. The tuk-tuks experience was great, not necessarily the safest alternative, and Des and I both felt that we have inhaled enough fumes from our Bangkok trip to make up for the lost time in KL while we were uphill…


We managed to find our way to one of the prominent shopping areas called Pratunam. And this is where, sadly, I admit defeat. One one particular floor, I was so overwhelmed with shoes that I walked out of the mall WITHOUT buying any! I was so stunned by the choices that I panicked and couldn’t choose! Well, to consoled myself, though the shoes were selling at (RM-equavalent)25 and above, the shoes were of Sg Wang’s quality and design. And so, I left the mall new-shoe-less, but with 4 tops and a skirt.


A funny story with the tops though, I was looking at the t-shirts, and I asked the salesperson for the price, and I heard she say, 1 for (RM-equavalent)15, 3 for (RM-equavalent)13. And so I grabbed 3 and took out (RM-equavalent)13, and THEN she say “No, no, if you buy three, each is (RM-equavalent)13!”. Don’t ask me why I couldn’t figured that out (during the conversation, even Des heard right but I keep insisting that I’m right!), cause it is a warehouse place and things are known to be ridiculously cheap…

The highlight of the trip? It’s the floating market trip. Though it caters mostly for tourist now, the experience itself is worthwhile. The instruction to keep your hands in the boat comes handy when our boat jostle next to each other to pass the narrow river. If you don’t like the fact that it has turned to a tourist experience more than local occurrence, just go just so you can buy food on the boat next to you. The sight of seeing a bbq pit in a boat is great enough an experience…


And what about our favourite pastime? We went to many shopping malls, and never seems to find a supermarket. I was about to give up and admits to Des that we’re spoilt and Bangkok people(?) still buys their meats and vegetables in a wet market until we chance upon TOPS! Hahah, finally a supermarket!


Overall, Bangkok was a wonderful trip. The weather was fine, and most of time, whenever we wanted to go out, it would have just finished raining, so the weather was wet and very cool. The people were very accommodating, probably because we were in a tourist area. Almost every other corner, there is a temple to explore (which we didn’t because we were not too keen on it), and the look and feel is almost exactly like KL. I mean, if you replace the Thai words into our Bahasa, wouldn’t you agree that this place looks exactly like Bukit Bintang???

21/09/2007

Back from Bangkok!


Its been a great holiday, and will write down the details soon.

Right now, got to go sleep, because tomorrow we will kick start a great plan (hopefully it will not died so soon!)

Store #722

And store #722 made it to my 2nd 7-11 entry. Of course there were few others stores before this, but the picture didnt turn out good, so will go back and retake again. Hehehe

Des's car drinks Projet. And sometime ago, we noticed that 7-11 has a thing going on with Projet, as every Projet station has a 7-11 convineant store instead of their own.

It has proven to be quite convineant really, and mostly the reason to pop in to buy things as the "feel" that we have was the stock should be quite "new" instead of old stocks that has been in the shop for god-knows-how-long.

We stopped by this station quite often, as its the last Projet station right before we hit the highway back uphill.

Only recently did we noticed that Shell has appear to have taken over Projet, and the black wira now drinks Shell (a conspiracy that its actually still old Projet petrol but disguised under Shell, but that's another story altogether).

So, this is the shop:

Address: LOT 5729, PROJET STATION, JLN LINGKARAN TENGAH II, 53300 GOMBAK
(Though I think the address needs to be updated now)
Purchase: HOT magazine
Price: RM4.90 (same price as everywhere else!)



And I bought the HOT magazine that I had wanted to buy but has been too busy! We're just heading back from a friend's wedding dinner (also another story!)

Another plus point for 7-11, it really makes things convineant!

*P/s, no, 7-11 didnt pay me for doing this, just something that I wanted to do. Though it WOULD be a good idea to have 7-11 sponsoring me to visit all the stores in Malaysia. Hmm..

18/09/2007

Leaving for Bangkok tomorrow!

Reality Shows

You know that I LOVED reality shows..

Survivor, The Apprentice, Joe the Millionaire, you name it, I loved it!

When I was in my uni days, I followed Big Brother like a hawk even though there's nothing interesting going on. I loved how the contestant bawled their eyes out and make catty remarks at each other.

My Sweet 16 from MTV is one of the better shows. It makes you go "WTF???" when the girl yelled "I hate my stupid idiotic mum" in front of the camera, bawling her eyes out when her mum presented her with a brand new CAR on the day BEFORE her birthday party!

Worlds Apart showcase how much we take technology for granted when families are invited to stay in another side of the world with minimum access to necessaties.

For Love or Money and The Bachelor helps you see what is the life of the rich and luxurious. I've always loved to think that I'll take part in the show just to see if I could win the "prize".

Reality show on celebrities are a slightly boring cause they only show the "allowed" bits and of course, we commoners would not be able to understand and relate to them.

I miss Jerry Springer. Need I say more?

Temptation Island, gosh, horrible horrible show but great scandals!

America's Next Top Model, American Idol, Project Runway, Hell's Kitchen is a job search-game show style that stretches for weeks long and usually makes me impatient and will run to the computer to search for the winner.

Queer Eye for the Straight Guy, Made, What Not to Wear usually makes me jealous because no celebrities usually come crashing into my place to help me "improve".

Hoaxes-types such as My Big Fat Obnoxious Boss and Joe Millionnaire and geniuses at work! Hahaha a monkey to decides whether you're good enough!

Just as you think there couldnt get better (or worst!) I saw my first episode of Who Wants to be a Superhero!!!

???

Dunno whether to laugh or cry.

Speechless, really.

08/09/2007

Keep telling myself that its no point rushing and comparing to others because one guy is a bastard, another owes people money and the last doesnt even want to be married in the first place.

Yea yea, so it is pretty obvious that I wanted to get married.

There, I've said it.

(Having said the above, this by no means indicates my willingness to discuss this with you unless I bring it up).

But there is a reason why and obviously you dont know and (as usual and as always like everyone else) its too complicated.

Anyway, that's the other reason why there's no link out to anyone in this website and i've managed to keep this place low profile. I've not an IT person, and not really interested in making this place a cute little blog with loads of stuff at the sidebar.

Think the only "advertisement" I did was through Friendster. Hence, only a handful of "you"s are reading this. Hehehe, like I said, the only "IT" thing I did with this place is the SiteMeter, and the pictures alignment in HTML still drives me crazy.

Otherwise, I wont be able to say such embarassing thing here thinking that friends of anyone will find out. But then of course, one of the reason of blogging is so that the world could read it right? Anyway, I've Julia to keep track of stuff with names (Haha, scandal!) and 512 is without.

Anyway, been keeping myself busy and thinking about Bangkok. This weekend is one of the weekend that I'll look forward because 1) I'm not going to be on GM duty on Monday 2) I'm going for training on Monday (meaning no need go office) 3) I can wear jeans to training and 4) Des is jumping shift on Monday!

Been having a lot on my mind (but then again, its so often that its normal!). Oh well, we'll see what happens...

:)

Silence

The one thing that strikes me about this movie is how echo-y their voice is and how silent the background is...

And it reminds me of my uni days at night, when everything is so dead silent.

And helps me imagine what life could be overseas...

02/09/2007

For the past few days, my mind has been kept very confused with an idea a few days ago.

I went on trying to get more information about this idea, hoping to make it a possible plan. I thought about the lifestyle change, I thought about the possible obstacles, I thought about the hard life, I thought about the consequences, I thought about everything!

But when I sit back and really think about it, I very soon realized that it wasnt the idea that excites me, rather it was what is supposed to happen BEFORE the plan that sends me into this frenzy.

I knew it was all for the wrong reasons, and yet I kept it at the back of my head while I wrote to friends looking for information on this.

This is not right.

You just cant go around popping ideas and giving me hopes when you are the one who squashes my dream and anticipation with a "I dont know to do this before I initiate this first..."

Despite the fact that this is exciting, possible and big, you owe me an apology on this confusion that you have put me in.

This is not right at all...

01/09/2007

A friend once commented that my blog is all about my shoes. And so, just to prove her point:

And I've successfully un-jinx my shopping spree and came back almost RM800 poorer.

And my arm looks like this (from carrying all the shopping bags) when we came back:

Oh well, enough said.

01/09/2007

Walau eh, there is a reason why bras are priced at RM200 ok!

Last year I spend more than 1k on lingeries, just to be mocked in Jusco with its RM10 bras.

Anyway, I'm sticking to my choice and will be ready for tomorrow on a shopping spree.

But then again, it has always proven to be unproductive whenever I had plans to splurge.

Oh well...

On another note, a friend said "that u can come back after a month or anytime, treat it like a holiday" suddenly shines light on an otherwise grey plan.

P/S: damn, now I'm even more confused. I've managed to browse around and found another option...

We really need to talk.

Game

It is, afterall, just a Game...

JACLYN VICTOR & RIO FEBRIAN - CERITERA CINTA

Lyrics

31/08/2007

A horrible day to drive back home for the long merdeka weekend.

The usual one-hour drive turns out to be a three hour crawl. Lets just say for the entire duration, I was on first gear.

All for a stupid lorry.

How did my hair fair in the office?

Mostly its the "Wah, so sayang, cut your long hair...", then followed by "Hmm, suit you ah, look like very corporate like..."

In another words, it looks matured loh! I dont understand, I thought short hair is suppose to make the person look younger, not older!

:(

But anyway, I STILL like it short now. Not so much of the less hair to care, though its even more mafan now that I've got to blow dry it, but I'm sick and tired of having it long.

And like I said earlier on, its not like I'm growing it for any big occasion.

That alone, is reason enough for me to chop it off.

I should really stop thinking about it.

And start thinking how convineant it is going to be during the Bangkok trip with my makeup free face and short hair!

Bangkok on the other hand, is really going to be a very short trip in 2 weeks time. We'll be arriving late evening on Monday and will be flying off Wed afternoon. So, its just a full day on Tues to get around.

But then again, our itinerary is mostly just to get away and to enjoy the food.

Hopefully, it will be a good trip, cause afterall, we've been looking forward to this trip since January this year...

Happy merdeka, people!

26/08/2007

Havent gotten used to my hair yet.

I'm still walking around imagining myself with long hair, and when I come across my own reflection and mirrors, looked at the round head, then only realized "oh yea, I look like this now..."

Hehehe, have to constantly catch my own reflection to remind myself how I looked like now.

Come on, its been YEARS since I have my hair this short.

Yea yea, the picture below looks a bit aunty, but thats because I was wearing my cheongsam to a wedding dinner.

Anyway, past few days and few more days to come, my temper has been and will be really, really bad.

Now that i've chopped of my hair as a way to channel out the anger, what else could I do next?

Perhaps, I should get a pet... Hmm... (Glad that there is no pet shop up hill, otherwise, I think my roomate would be suprise to return to a room full of pets!!!)

And, to make matters worst, I'll be on my own for the next few days.

Talk about the worst possible combination during PMS.

Oh well, on a lighter note, it will be now about 3 weeks before our Bangkok trip!

Hmm, could start chanelling all my energy into looking for places/things to go/do in Bangkok!

26/08/2007

Note to self: Decline any wedding invitation if it clashes with your period week.

PMS + Wedding = BAD COMBINATION

Now leave me alone...

25/08/2008

Woke up, feeling extra extra grumpy over many things, and decided to chop it all off.

Inilah muka 20 sen aku sekarang...
Just to remind myself, this is how my hair used to look like.

Special Kids

Things had been hectic at work, and I'm back for the weekend.

A couple of pictures on what happened last weekend:

Last weekend, I got a chance to be part of an event where special kids and senior citizens were invited to the hill for a day of fun.

And it turned out great. I was lucky in the sense that I was kinda prepared with what I was going to faced on that day. I believed that my days of teaching and volunteering has helped me to be comfortable with the kids.

Do you know why this day was special to me?

Because for a few weeks now, I have been thinking about options and whether I could go back to teaching and spending lots of time with kids.

And these kids helps reminds me of those days, those wonderful days where I'd spent time playing with them, helping the teachers prepare for their activities, hearing them laugh as they go about playing and meeting up with the parents who is determined to give the very best to their kids.

And why I left.

Store #572

If you look around, you'll noticed a sudden mushroom-ing activity of 7-11 stores throughout Malaysia.

You are bound to see a 7-11 store anywhere from a petrol station right up to a small kucik town along the road.

And for a while now, I've been toying with this idea of going to every 7-11 stores that I come across and taking a picture of it, as part of my travelling journal.

You see, partly due to the fact I'm caught up hill most of the time, the urge to explore places is high and in order to keep dates interesting, I often come up with places, often hypermarkets, that we've never been before as an activity to explore and spend time together.

And I have noticed that there are 7-11s almost every where we go! That's where I got an idea of 7-11 travelling log/journal to capture the places that I've been to.

Well, of course I've missed many opportunities prior to having this idea, but it never hurts to start now right? How this works? Well, basically, the idea is to go into that 7-11 store and buy one item and capture a picture in front of the store with the purchase.

Easy right? Though things are slightly more expensive, the fun is to buy something like an ice cream or a drink and to take a picture of it. Since 7-11s are now found in the most unconventional place, how else will you get a chance to explore those roadside shops that you pass oh-so-frequently but never walked to it???

And do you know, apparently, according to their website, there are now 890 stores around Malaysia???

So to kick start things off, when Des and I went for a short trip to PD, we took our first picture of store #572

Address: No: 11, Jln Mahajaya, Port Dickson Centrepoint, 71000 PD, N.S.
Purchase: One bottle of Lipton Ice Tea
Price: Forgot liao (must remember to put price)

And the obligatory picture.

I know its a bit dark, but its midnight and I only have my camera phone!

For the flash to be close enough to capture my face, the 7-11 logo will be hidden!

Hopefully, next time we'll be more prepared! Hehehe

One down, 799 more to go!

Rambut panjang ke pendek???

For a while now, I've had long hair for as long as I remember. I've only had short hair once, and that was WAY back in school.

HISTORY
On the 3rd day since my last exam paper during SPM, I 'm off to the salon to get my first red bloody-super-painful-condom-styled highlight that cost me RM500. And that RM500 was NINE years ago.

After the highlight, came my first perm. I still remembered going to the salon that day, telling the aunty that I wanted a perm, and the aunty enthusiastically replied "yea yea, the popular one right???" And I nodded, having no idea what I just agreed to.

The next thing I knew, I was having this super-tight-frizzy-curls that looks like i've just been electrocuted. The effect was nice though, cause I have fine and little hair, so the texture was very soft to touch and it gives me a whole lot of volume that I've never dream of having.

Hence, my love of curls began.

Since then, throughout the college and uni years, it was mostly in curls, big ones, small ones, chemical ones, electric ones, need-to-put-a-lot-of-lotion ones, no-need-to-put-any-lotion ones, etc.

Only one type of perm i didnt go for though, its the cockscrew ones that looks exactly like you havent washed your hair in months type.

Took me a while before finally deciding to straighten my hair. Cause i'm afraid it'll be too flat. After years since my first perm, I walked out of the salon with a neck pain (after spending close to SIX hours), RM800 poorer and super silky straight hair.

In betweens, there were perms, but of course, somehow or rather, I'll still go back to straightening it. Cause its SO EASY to take care of!! Girls with perms, remember the gob that you have to put on your hair? Remember the no comb rule? Remember that AIR DRY means sitting underneath the ceiling fan for THREE hours??? And how with a gush of wind, the whole hair go crazy?

Now, my hair is at its longest. Never have I have my hair this long, around the waist.

And I'm getting sick of it.

I hardly tie up my hair, let alone style it. Pulling my hair up gives my headache, and I'm too obsessed about having clips at the exact right place (without senget) to spend much time styling it.

I've finally decided to chop it off tomorrow.

Spend quite some time thinking and pondering.

Thinking whether I should at least give it one final perm before cutting it show, perhaps should cut it gradually shorter instead of a chop, long hair is easier to care cause cow licks drives me crazy, etc...

And you know what is the final straw?

Is that when I realized its not like I'm keeping my hair for anything special anyway...

(p/s attending a wedding tomorrow, so you do the maths)

Kepala Angin

Is it my fault that I dont recognize myself these days anymore?

Recently I had a chance to work with my ex-schoolmate whom I havent met in years. And based on our meetings, I wander whether she thinks "Oh my, she is a bitch now!"

Problem is, I dont know whether its a good thing that I've somewhat 'evolve' into this person whom I could hardly recognize anymore. I'm sure for those whom I havent met in ages would notice how different I am now.

I'm not talking about physical changes, more on the fact that I noticed that I am a much more angrier person now.

So angry, that I lost my temper at the wrong person.

Took me a second to realize what I did when he mentioned that I shouldnt have yelled at him.

Was so guilty moments later, but then I rationalize that it wasnt because of other factor that make me raise my voice, its the fact that I have been irritated by him.

And what suprises me even more is that, while I find myself thinking 'Damn, he will sure story this to everyone else", I also thought "Oh well, cant be helped anyway."

I've ALWAYS cared what others thought of me. And this little sentence above shows the complete opposite. Really, who cares if I've lost my temper anyway, when I myself has been on the receiving end many times.

Apparently, what they say about this place is true. People who works here long enough WILL develop a symtom what we called "kepala angin". Meaning a high tendency to lost temper, though the frequency may differ from time to time. If you are lucky, the patient will treat you good. If you caught the person at a bad time, you'll suffer from unnecessary scoldings.

Any treatment? No known cure yet, though prevention is better than cure.

Prevention?

To get AWAY from this place, of course!

Recurring Dreams

Recurring Dreams

Most dreams contain messages that serve to teach us something about ourselves. Unfortunately many a times we forget what we dream about as we go about our daily routine. With recurring dreams, the message may be so important and/or powerful that it just will not go away. The frequent repetition of such dreams forces you to pay attention and confront the dream. The dream is trying desperately to tell you something. Such dreams are often nightmarish or frightening in their content, which also helps you to take notice and pay attention to them.

Recurring dreams are quite common and are often triggered by a certain life situation or a problem that keeps coming back again and again. These dreams may recur daily, once a week, or once a month, but whatever the frequency, there is little variation in the dream content itself. It usually points to a personal weakness, fear, or your inability to cope with something in your life - past or present.

The repetitive patterns in your dream can reveal some of the most valuable information on yourself. It may point to a conflict, situation or matter in your waking life that remains unresolved or unsettled. Or some urgent underlying message in your unconscious is demanding to be understood.

I.DONT.LIKE.

Too dark and too quiet...

Apparently, my mum heard someone screamed just outside our house. She suspect its some snatch thief.

I dont feel safe here.

I really dont.

Its funny how I sometimes have trouble sleeping when i'm back home.

One of the reason is that I find it too dark and too quiet.

Its quiet because my room faces the back alley and there are no traffic at all.

Its dark because I have my dark blue curtains to block lights out in the morning.

Which drives me crazy and send my mind to work overtime to think about how bad the night could turn out.

I actually prefer my room uphill, facing the brightly lit carpark, with the occational shouts from drunken customers, loud car alarms and the zooming of cars to and fro.

I sleep better, knowing there were people out there going about minding their own business, instead of some strangers going about quietly thinking of how to break-in.

Maybe I could do well staying just right in front of the mainroad. I know it will be slightly cheaper, cause most people dislike the dust, the noise, and the traffic, but like they say, the most likely place is the most unlikely place right???

But where else could I go?

11/08/2007

See, i told you that we women are crazy bitches.

Finally got my hands on the long overdue letter. But there were hardly any emotions, let alone celebrations. Though the promise has been delivered, I knew it came disguised as a brickwall to move forward.

On another note, a question caught me by suprise. I am suprised that I have not actually thought about it and just blabble a logical answer.

Just like me right? One who refuses to put too much thoughts into things that I want to happen, in fear that whatever I dream of will NEVER materialized. Instead, choosing to spend lots of time thinking about what could go WRONG, hoping that the more I think about the scenarios, the less likely it will happen.

Almost like the I-dream-of-what-to-do-with-the-lottery-money-but-I-never-will-win kinda moment.

And when it finally happen, I will just choose the most logical way out (logic, so like me!) instead of taking time to think what I want.

I mean, what am I supposed to do at that point of time? Say "I'll think about it and let you know???"

Dont ask me what it is, else I'll just cry right in front of you.

NOW that you got me thinking about this, NOW I know that things will NEVER happen the way I thought it would.

Thank you very much.

Comfort

I’ve been humbled by many things over the past few weeks.

An expected news came, and though I have been thinking about it for months, I am surprised that I’ve been rather quiet about it. Insecurities hit me and despite the fact that I have been spending lots of time thinking about it before this, I was still quite unprepared to face it.

Then some another experiences came to show me that everyone has its own strength and abilities. Though they may not be suited for certain activities, they shouldn’t be stereotype against anything. For the first time in the past year, I felt competition.

And it felt good.

It felt good to feel that there are others better than me, and I felt belittled. Don’t take me wrong, but I feel tingly to feel scared again to be matched up against these people. Clearly, I am too comfortable in where I am, and to see that there are many more executives that are far more capable than me.

I am losing the competitiveness I have in me, and my situation will continue to worsen if I do not strive to experience more.

Indeed, it is becoming a problem.

Something has to be done…

08/08/2007

You know that moment when you are humming a certain song and the next thing you hear is the DJ playing the song?

:)

Paris Hilton (Part 2)

With regards of what I wrote earlier on a few days ago, about being lucky but not perfect. Many people tend to only see the good side of the story. Pretty much on the "grass is greener on the other side" statement.

You know what I've learn from reading the Paris Hilton book? Or why I read any of these books by celebrities? Its because helps me see that life on the "other luckier side", and to help me see that life is not that perfect either.

Many a times, I know I rattle on too much about the little little minute things in my life when most of it is in place anyway. You see, again, what you see is only the perfect side. The dark and horrible things that have happen to me is never shown or told. And this is always a reminder to myself whenever I find myself getting irritated over these things, that there is ALWAYS another side of the coin that I do not know about, and probably explains why certain people does things their way.

Again, what do I learn from the Paris Hilton book? That I'm in some ways luckier than her because I could go and get drunk and make a fool of myself without anyone giving a damn, and that she couldnt get out of the house without spending time dolling up else the world will critizise on her makeup free look.

In that book, I spotted one bad picture of her. Bad as her face is pale and red and blotchy and looks nothing like her. Now, I dont know why that picture made it into the book, but it does suddenly make me realized that RM90 (initially I quoted the book to be at RM109) is worth it.

I need to read books such as this to constantly remind myself how lucky I am but it doesnt mean that I should be arrogant in anyway.

But then again, people read blogs/books/articles about how horrible their lives are, not how sugary and flowery it is. Sugary and flowery people irritates me because they live in the world that is sweet and perfect and they whine everytime things doesnt go the perfect way.

But then of course, if the sugary and flowery people has experience horrible experience before, then it makes them just like everyone else :)

And the second lesson learnt from the book?

Is to "always tell everyone what they want to hear. Then do what you want."

31/07/2007

A good time indeed.

Happy Birthday Babe!

This is the second consecutive year that we're spending our anniversary in Port Dickson. It wasnt initially planned that way at all, but with the free apt and offdays, somehow things just came together.

It was a good trip, a relaxing trip, just the way I like it. We werent rushing to go anywhere. In fact managed to squeeze a 4 hour nap in between! Weather was wet, but cooling most of the time, which makes it even more bearable and a less irritable me! Dinner was fantastic with the right ambiance. Found a couple of hypermarts (our favourite pastime?) and even managed to have a cook out for breakfast beside the beach the next morning.

The view from our "breakfast hut"

Though it was a short getaway, but definately worth it. Sometimes, it doesnt have to be anywhere far and expensive.

Lazy to go back to work tomorrow, definately.

On the another note, I've been wearing only flat slippers for the past 6 days, and now my calf hurts. 4-inch heels everyday no pain, i'd thought i give you a rest and now this is how you repay me???

30/07/2007

I am going to do something I've never done for a long time.

I am going on a holiday without my makeup bag.

Oh well, even though its only PD and an overnight stay.

But still, its STILL a holiday and a special occasion to that ;-)

But both of us will not be taking any camera with us, except for the camera phones, in which I believe the quality wouldnt be as sharp, hence, pictures taken (if any) of me wouldnt be as ghastly as it should be.

Afterall, you have to understand, cause before this, makeup free usually mean an eyebrow free me, which looks something like voldermort (even i thinks he looks better!).

So, this would be the first time I go on a holiday without makeup but looking as normal as I could.

Hence, putting all my faith into my good skin alone (and of course the very expensive fake eyebrows), I am finally going to experience what it feels like to go on a holiday without the hassle of makeup and taking pictures with a face with all features complete.

On another note, I know and am very grateful that I am lucky in many aspects in my life, but contrary to what many has come to believe, being lucky is far from being perfect...

Cause nobody's perfect.

So, stop judging me and start feeling grateful for youself!

Life is NOT fair, cause if it is, you're NOTHING!

29/07/2007

Muka 20 sen.

Lepas 2 hari, nampak masih sama. Tak kopek lagi... Tapi masa untuk makeup dah separuh! :P

Valerie Tay (1981 - 2007)

(13 years ago)
I knew her during secondary school, and was in the same class with her during Form One. During that time, we werent best friends, but I guess we talked a bit. Yes, I admit, I wasnt close to her.

(13 years later)
Then came the sudden news of her death from a friend via msn one day at work. She was suffering from bipolar disorder and has chosen to end her life.

A month later, I found out that a couple of her friends are getting together to help raise funds to the Malaysia Mental Health Association by participating in a blogathon.

Then I also found out that one of her favourite song is Cyndi Lauper’s “Walk On By”. Now, I couldnt find her singing that song in youtube, but I found Seal's cover version of it instead...

Lyrics



Val, though we hardly spoke to each other thoughout the years in school, I thank God for the chance to get to know you. Though you may have felt alone, I can see that many of your friends has felt less lonely with your friendship. You have make your presence felt in our lives and you will be missed. Rest in peace,...

Jerry Springer

I suddenly miss watching "Jerry Springer Show"...

28/07/2007

(Picture taken about 2 hours after procedure)

How plainful is this? Have you tried taking a mechanical pencil and poking yourself in short quick strokes using the metal tip? Now, try imagining the metal tip as needles and imagine having like 10 or 20 of it lined up together and poking you...

Not too bad, tolerable most of the time. After a while it kinda gets numb, and only when they start poking on fleshy areas then you start grining your teeth.

Information overload? :P

Looked slightly off and one side is slightly thicker, but that's only if you studied the picture long enough. And she says that after a week only will be able to gauge the results better, and will have to return a month later for touch up wor... Which is funny cause I've heard others saying it should be a week's time.

Not too worried about the senget part for now, cause anything is definately better than drawing everyday...

And to turn this entry even more girly, apparently I've to keep the brows dry for at least two days. Meaning washing my face ala facial way. Please, no breakouts yea...

And I'm given a small amount of cream to apply on the brows for a week. And it will start to harden and flake soon enough wor. Now, already i feel a bit tight whenever I frown. You know how it feels when your wound hardens and the scabs kinda threaten to break apart?

Told you this will be bimbo-ish with too much information... hehe...

Overall, it wasnt as bad as I've expected. After the whole thing is done, I even went to walk around Midvalley for a short time while waiting for my mum to pick me up later. Btw, I did this in Ultimate Impression. It wasnt as dark and as horrible than I expected it to be, albeit a bit red (from the poking) and wet (reflection from the cream). Was quite relieved that I can still show up in public, but the not that confident enough to continue walking around and instead choose a little corner in McDonalds hidden from view to have lunch and catch up on reading.

But that doesnt stop me from buying this though...

Not too bad. Covered stuff like what to do and what not to do to boast your confidence, etc. But of course, I'm much more interested in juice details of her life and to be caught up with the book rather than to appreciate the literature side of it. Loads of pictures about her, not really good in terms of value, but hey, I wanted it!

Total cost? Its supposed to be RM380 with free 2 touch up within a year (TOLD you this is girly entry!), but the girl conned me into the RM500 package with free 2 touch up, 3 body treatment and eye treatment. Ok, I was thinking more of letting my mum go for the treatments since its transferable and I wont be around much anyway. Initially its supposed to be 1 body treatment (RM100) and 1 facial (RM200), but I've very skeptical on facials other than those done in Dermalogica (habis, you think the above picture comes cheap ah??), so I bargained and she exchanged the facial for 2 more body treatment instead.

And book cost me RM109.

And that was actually the reason why I choose to stay in McD instead, cause I'm already broke and way out of my budget, why spend time walking around anymore???

Linkin Park - Bleed it Out

Lyrics

Plain White Ts - Hey There Delilah

Lyrics

26/07/2007

Si liao lah... the August itch to spend is starting again...

Its has been a hectic July. Been putting in extra hours purely because I wanted to clear all the work since I wasnt in the office often mid month and a week long holiday right about now!

Kicked start the holidays with a night in a hotel in KL yesterday night. Wasted a day on training and am back home now. Supposed to go Fraiser Hill over the weekend, but cancelled last minute (sorry! but I'm sure you'll have a great time!) cause I thought I wanted to spend more in at home and to (perhaps) see a couple of people. Then, after the weekend, gonna spend a night at Port Dickson (curtesy of a lucky draw) and will be back work on 1st Aug.

Today though, I met an interesting person. He is a manager in some company and we were grouped together for a few activities for today's training. After the first few minutes, I was smiling to myself. You know why? Cause at the back of my mind, I was going, this is so NOT the person that I wanted to work with. He is obnoxious, controlling and couldnt seems to make up his mind. He dictates everything that we discuss and ignore everything that we say. Whatever we say is not good enough, and whatever he says is correct. The other team member is very soft spoken, and he is reduced to just writting down whatever the Mr Obnoxious says. Its not just facts, just simple BASIC sentence structure he will want to use his way, down to every choice of WORD. Yup, its that bad. And then, he gets so indecisive, that even though the sentence is of his choice, when it comes to transfering the information to the presentation slides, he STILL wants to change. That means, even the small minute 5% of our contribution also no more already.

I am just SO GLAD he is not my boss.

On the other hand, (finally) going to do my eyebrow embroidery tomorrow morning. Been looking forward to it as its been something that I've wanted to do. Hope it looks good. No, all I hoped for is for it to look balanced. Then, perhaps will go for some retail theraphy. Been wanting to spend sometime alone out shopping :P

Hopefully, I'll be able to recharge my batteries to go back work again...

Books

Trottled down to Borders two days ago. Spent about an hour running up and down the bookstore (this multi-storeyed concept is really NOT practical at all!) looking for books.

No, it wasnt the Harry Potter book. I've given up on that since book 5.

Instead, I was running around the books and finally settling for these...

Took me a while to find the above three, cause they were all over the place. They dont have an autobiography section (unlike the previous store that I went to). Found Teri Hatcher's Burnt Toast under the Self-help section, laughed at myself when I found it cause I couldnt believe I was buying something from this section. Its less than an inch thick, and I thought, well this wont last me for weeks, and went around to the info counter/computer trying to remember celebrities names and trying to check if they've ever written any books.

Then I found Victoria's That Extra Half An Inch. I've come across this book when one of the magazines did a review on this. Something along the line of her trying to write about fashion and trying to suggest places to shop. Now, somehow or rather, you know that I've into gossips and lifes of celebrities. And before Janice Dickinson, there's actually Victoria Beckham's Learning to Fly. This was a few years back, and when I saw this book, it was kinda pricey at RM109. Was contemplating whether to buy, but after 15 minutes of running around but STILL holding this book, I gave up and thought, what the hell, if I spend so long thinking whether to buy this book, then I MUST want this book...

So, I thought, I must get another book to read, cause I know Burnt Toast wont last long and Victoria Beckham is just.. well, shopping. So, then it was Goldie Hawn's A Lotus Grows In the Mud and a couple others. The others were matured celebrities that I've heard of but not so familiar with their background (meaning no idea on their juicy lifestory hence no interest yet). And so I picked Goldie's one instead.

Mostly, I am looking to AUTObiography, instead of those written by others and not the celebrity itself. Well, if i want to read about a third party opinion, I could have just picked up any gossip magazines right? Well, what if its just a marketing gimmick and the celebrities didnt really write it themselves? Well, I'm really stupid and I am easily convinced, the moment i see the name of the author matching the picture, I am sold :)

Was trying to find Michael J Fox's Lucky Man and Janice Dickinson's Everything About Me Is Fake: And I'm Perfect!, but unfortunately the first is out of stock and the second, well, apparently they dont carry it.

Walau eh, these books dont come cheap ler... Oh well, all for the sake of reading right???

Cover your backside.

Coming back to the dead cat's story, i noticed that there is a similarity with both the incidents.

The first time it happened, I noticed a drastic change in my working approach. The change was very sudden and just the matter of days.

Since young, Ive always have stage fright, and whenever I'm required to speak in public, my knees goes weak and my voice shakes. Especially when its a round-the-table discussion, I always plan ahead on what I'm going to say, and that also it has to be thought carefully. Often, when I'm finally done constructing the sentence in my mind, the topic would have long gone.

But after that incident, talking up front is suddenly no longer a problem. My knees no longer shake, and instead of wasting time thinking and putting together my thoughts, I find myself just speaking my mind and talking out loud. Suddenly, my tolerance level went down the drain, and I am quick to anger, and I find it hard to tolerate incompetency. Suddenly, I find myself talking and controlling meetings, heading presentations, showing temper and shouting, and not to mention, MC-ing a function without much thought, something I would never thought I could do.

Cause I still remember how badly my knee shake during my interview in a position with this place.

Now, just a few days ago, again, I sense a sudden and drastic change in my attitude again. I procastinate less (in terms of urgent things lah, others not THAT drastic yet), and find myself rushing others to get it done. For others, it would seems as if i'm overly concerned and cowardly, but after that incident, I suddenly find myself getting sick and tired of excuses. Yes means yes, no means no lah. And wasting time dwelling on issues seems unnecessary.

Sometimes, people forget and lost plot down the way. I find myself very protective, and I will go all out just to make sure I'm "protected", making sure my path is covered with valid reasons.

Cause I'm on my own.

And I hate to see history repeat itself.

Lesson #3 Cover your backside.

Dead cat?

Do you know, that there is a fine line between “pai sheung toi” (placed on top of table) and “sek sei mau” (eat dead cat)?

I’ve been “placed on top of table” numerous times, but its just about keeping my cool and faking it through.

But to “eat dead cat” is a totally different matter altogether. It is about taking the blame for other people’s faults.

And today, I was served my second dead cat dish.

The first time I ate it, I carry the hatred with me till today.

This second dish will not be any different.

Norah Jones (not!)

I have a love-hate relationship with Norah Jones.

I love the soothing, jazz feel of the music. Always feels like I'm in a warm and cozy room, sitting by the fireplace with a glass of white wine, listening to the music, looking out to a fantastic view of the city. Very easy and relaxing, just like a scene right out from the TV.

But I hate the moment I stopped listening. I hate to leave that cozy room, to face the harsh reality. There is no warm and cozy room, only my bright bedroom. There is not fireplace, only the hot weather. There is no wine, but only water, or beer&7Up. And there is no view, only staring into other people's apartments!

Aiks...

09/07/2007

I WANT! I WANT! I WANT!

(tears streaming down with a screwed up face)

I DONT UNDERSTAND, HOW COME OTHERS CAN AND I CANT!!!

(Bawling loudly) WWWAAAAHHH!!!

ITS HURTS SO MUCH!!!

(wipe tears of face and blow nose)

YES, I'M JEALOUS! YES, I'M ENVIOUS! YES, I'M BITTER! BUT WHY!?! WHY!?!

(screws up face and starts bawling again) WWAAAHHH!!!

I WANT! I WANT! IS IT TOO MUCH TO ASK FOR!?!

(kick legs and roll around the floor)

I WANT IT NOW!!!

(resist any coaxing or pleading)

ENOUGH IS ENOUGH!

(push away and refuse anything)

I HATE THIS!

(stands up, wipes face and run away crying...)

08/07/2007

Great, I missed a day of my medication, and I spend the WHOLE SUNDAY sleeping and having weird dreams.

Right before I came down, I promised myself that I'll drag my sorry ass out to run errands and not to stay at home whole day.

That was BEFORE the heavy rain on Sunday morning and the cooling effect it has for the rest of the day.

Not sure whether its the medication, but my emotion is a wreak and I ended up sleeping most of the day off, waking up only to shower and eat. And I have weird dreams too.

Wont tell you what it is though, its scandalous enough.

Damn, I'm tired...

08/07/2007

I just finished paying off my Nokia 7380 (12-months installments),

Was toying on the idea of changing phone, and I had a certain model in my mind.

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

Then I saw this on Friendsters.

So I click on it and took the personality test to see which phone suits my personality...

Answered a few questions,...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

And voila!

Just the phone that I was thinking about! Hehehe...

Books

Last time, when I started on a book, I usually like to finish reading it at one go. Preferably undisturbed. And there were numerous occasions when I was so engrossed with it that I hardly noticed others around. And books were accessible last time, cause I usually rent them and I'll just exchanged it for some other books.

Back then, I also have a lot of time.

Now, its different with this one.

Never have I managed to continue reading a book for 5 consecutive nights (2-3 chapters each night) and still find myself looking forward to read it.

You see, the problem about fiction books is that it tends to have a beginning, a peak, and of course, an ending.

And then, you're left hanging.

The good thing about biography is that the story is real. Of course, there is a beginning, but each chapters brings an equally exciting story and it never ends.

I like the fact that it never ends. Well, of course the book does, but then life still continues.

And the fact that whatever "stories" that the books brings, is REAL, and not just fiction. The love is real, the pain is real, the story as it unfolds, IS REAL. Though of course, i'm sure a lot of dramatization is involved, but then, dont we always dramatize our own life? Yes, we read about abuse everyday, but to read about one's experience, no matter how much excitement we add to the story, an abuse is STILL an abuse. And the emotions that the reader felt when reading, is probably a superbly small percentage of what the author ACTUALLY felt. Isnt that amazing, to know that the book is what life is all about, and not just some fictional story that a person writes to manipulate's the reader.

One of the reasons I stopped reading for a while is that I find the books void of life. So what, at 26, there is NO happily ever after. Though one may feel tingly from the story when everything finally works out, it often left me thinking, what happen AFTER that? And then i realized, cheh, this doesnt exist at all!!!

I'm not good with horror books though. Usually I got lost in the plot and I ended up speed reading through it so that I could get to the ending.

But its different with autobiography. There is no ending. Each chapter represent a mark in the author's life, and in life, there is no ending, regardless whether its a good one. Life goes on.

And I find myself looking forward to spend an hour or so each night, reading up the book. And I know that I dont have to finish it up, cause there isnt an ending to it. Its the life experience that I find so intriguing. Life itself, how it has treated others, and how they tell their side of the story.

And I dont have to lose sleep over reading.

And I've never been in a state where I am STILL interested in the book after 5 days.

*I still havent managed to finished reading Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix. Despite all that hype and to think of the things I did to buy it.

I know what is next on my list after this book though. Teri Hatcher's "Burnt Toast and Other Philosophies of Life".

Then I found out that Janice has two more books out, "Everything About Me is Fake... And I'm Perfect" and "Check Please!: Dating, Mating, and Extricating".

Heard about Michael J Fox's Lucky Man, and I'm all excited, but I only have so much time and money!

06/07/2007

Could it be?

How could it be?

How could it be that I am afraid?

Afraid after all these years...

Quietdrive - Time After Time Live

Lyrics

03/07/07

And so again, it is the end of my 4 days off.

Over the weekend, a bunch of us drove down to Melaka to attend a friend's wedding dinner.

It was all fun and good, except for the horrible hot weather.

If its cooler, I'm sure we would have explored the town more and would have gotten more good food.

And I would have enjoyed the satay celup experience more if not for the makeup, corset and the sweltering heat from the pot.

Really lah, NOW i teringin nak makan satay celup :P

Well, the trip that all of us has been talking about for weeks is now over.

What else is there to look forward to?

Well, end of this month there would be a Fraser Hill trip and perhaps also a PD trip.

Gosh, how to work lah, like this???

The heat is really getting into me. It something that I've never gotten used to. Really, is it the high maintenance side of me, or is everywhere generally getting hotter???

On another note, I bought Janice Dickinson's No Lifeguard On Duty. Hope its a good one.

02/07/2007

"...3 weeks..."
"...4 weeks.."

Funny how they both had one thing in common.

Wander if this shows a trend?

No high hopes for this one though...

Good Charlotte - Keep Your Hands Off My Girl

Lyrics

Dashboard Confessional - Vindicated

Lyrics

Papa Roach - Scars

Lyrics

Panic! At the Disco - I Write Sins Not Tragedies

Bear with me for a while, with all these videos. I've no laptop and no means to download/store my songs, and this is the only way I could (sort of) save a list of the songs I like :)

Fall Out Boy - Thanks for the memories

Lyrics

29/06/2007

I've successfully manage to keep my bills down to a "clearable" amount every month.

Very happy with it, and suddenly feel like spending it on books.

For some time now, I've had an interest in autobiography. Celebrities from the entertainment industry autobiographies especially.

And the last few books I've bought was those and since I've wanted to get my hands on some others.

Perhaps, with the manageble expenses now, I could kick start my reading habits again?

Acha feat Irwansyah - Ada Cinta

Lyrics

30 Seconds to Mars - The Kill

Lyrics

Wanted to watch "The Shining" because of this, but i'm scared shit.

Wanted to read the book instead(?)

Money is not everything, but without money you're nothing!

When I was in primary school, I was given 20 cents as allowance everyday to spend. And everyday without fail, my mum will pack me two slices of bread (either with kaya or peanut butter) and put it in a clear plastic bag for me to take to school.

And everyday without fail, I'll throw it away. Because by the recess time, its soggy and I hate that. Because that, I've grown to hate bread.

But anyway, bread story aside, back to the allowance. So, everyday I'm given 20 cents to buy things to eat at school. And everyday I go to school, standing at the entrance, looking at all the food they were selling (my school canteen is fantastic, like a mini food court i tell you!), glanced at my 20 cent coin, and saw that what was standing between me and the food is the coin.

Lesson #1 Money very important.

So, i still remember, every Tuesday would be my favourite day, because that's when the canteen serves prawn mee, and my 20 cents will get me a small bowl (well that was years ago, and I AM getting old). Other than that, I couldnt afford anything else, because everything else cost more than 20 cents (see, I am not THAT old afterall).

So anyway, moving on, in Year 2 or Year 3, another distant cousin joined my school. And since I was older, I was told to jaga her.

Guess how much she got for allowance each day? RM2!

Yes, I shamelessly admit that at that time, each recess, I took her money to buy things for myself to eat. She also stupidly let me cause I'm older mah. But few days later, I got busted when she told her mum what happended.

Lesson #2 Never borrow money from anyone.

cont'...

27/06/07

This time last year, I was busy shopping because of the bloody Mega Sale. Took me months before I could clear the bills.

Wander if I'll do it again this year.

:)

Speechless, really...

25/07/2007

Given a short amount of time, I can do your job.

But given the same amount of time, you cannot do mine.

Where am I?

(You have to be here to appreciate this!)

Mr. P: Excuse me, where is Resorts World?
We: ...

Blue October - Hate Me

Lyrics

Pictures from my camera phone

Does this picture looks as fake as it can be?

At certain time of the month, whenever I catch a glimpse of this building, I smiled to myself :)

A quiet lobby.

The white background are the pleats from my curtains. Bugs are this big here, I kid you not.

Me.

Skeletons in the closet coming out to play...

Recent news about a school friend who committed suicide due to depression shocked me. When I heard of the news, there are so many questions to ask and yet it is too late.

I guess, every now and then, every one of us will feel down and the monsters and skeletons of our life will come out to haunt us.

And it is the ability to acknowledge them and politely ask them to go back to the closets is what helps us continue to live.

For those who continued to entertain these monsters and skeletons, they will eventually get comfortable and will refuse to go back; hence, they will be haunted with their presence.

I don’t believe in sending them away. Sending them away will only create an opportunity in which one day they will come back and we will be caught in surprise, totally unprepared.

Despite having to hide them, I am more comfortable keeping them in a dark cold place away from everyone, but a place that I know exactly where they are. Yes, once in a while they will be naughty and decides to come out to stretch their legs, but if you are nice to them, they will go back into hiding.

And everyday I live a life, reminded by the fact that they are hiding up there, and live day-by day, grateful that today is not the day that they come out to play.

Even if one fine day, when they do finally get bored and decides to come out of their hiding place for everyone to see and never to hide again, I live my life grateful for what it has been, as I could only hide them for so long.

For my life could have been far worst.

Or perhaps, pessimistically thinking, the worst has yet to come.

Blame game

The day that I blame it all on.

The day when I lie down alone on my bed, wandering what went wrong, I thought of that day.

The day when I cried myself to sleep on cold nights, wandering what happened, I thought of that day.

The day when I felt empty and lonely despite being surrounded by people, wandering what is it that I longed for, I thought of that day.

The day when I longed to be doing what others are doing, wandering when it’s my turn, I thought of that day.

The day when I feel my lowest, wandering if things could be different, I thought of that day.

Then I remembered everything else that happened after that day.

And I am ashamed of myself for feeling this way.

I seem to have a lot of anger inside me. The frustration on the way things are going, the resentment on why things are not happening, the despair on not knowing and the misery on what had happened.

And sometimes, the build up of all these feelings just blow up whenever the bottle is full and a button is pushed.

Of course, on days like these, everything else seems irrelevant.

But when I lie down and listen to a steady soft beat as I slowly fall asleep, I knew nothing was wrong.

The day when my tears were dried with kisses and soft soothing words calmed me, I knew nothing was wrong.

The day when I walked around amidst huge crowd of people and guided by a firm grip by the hand, I knew nothing was wrong.

The day when we sat down and talked about our future after a good meal, I knew nothing was wrong.

The day when I buried my face in a warm familiar hug, I knew nothing was wrong.

Despite driving myself crazy and letting anger take over me, I remind myself of them.

He, who visits his parents separately because they are divorced,
She, who is left alone because he is thousands of miles away,
He, who could not hug her because he could not move,
And she, who is now lifeless, and may she rest in peace.

Though at times when I feel most vunerable, I hope that my anger would help me survive and overcome any obstacles that may come in my way.

070607

I am confused.

And knowing me, I’ll just take a mere second to decide and be done with it.

But not this time.

I want to take a step behind and to be able to see clearly the whole situation.

I didn’t want to make a decision I’ll regret. I’d tend to get too excited over these things and get caught up with the situation that wasting time choosing the inevitable seems unnecessary.

However, I am grateful of this opportunity. It shows me what I could be facings months down in time. The situation would be the same later, its just the matter of now or later.

Yes, the prospect and offer is great, though after some initial calculation, it will not be that much. But then again, I am not sure if this is the most I could get.

Money aside, the prospect is good, and I forsee a lot of work. So much so that I actually doubt if I could deliver. Insecurity clouds over me as I wander if I’m expected to deliver more than I could handle. I

Of course, the thought of returning home looks inviting. But for that, I’ll have to pay the price of being in a long distance relationship and will not be able to spend as much time as we do here. And yes, that is enough for me to reconsider. But it is for a short term. But half a year?

But all these things, its just a matter of time right? If its not now, it would be later, regardless of who is leaving first. And worst case scenario, what if I could never match this?

Which brings me into another concern. A very sensitive issue that I believe we both have not discussed. “Kong chin sheung kam cheng” (Talks about money will hurt relationships). How true is that saying. But at the bottom at my heart, I truly believe he will go far, and that in the end, all will be okay.

The inevitable is bound to happen. Unfortunately, life does not always happen the way we wanted it. Its just a matter of now or later. And I am grateful for this opportunity. I now have more time to weigh all aspects of the decision, instead of waiting for the very last minute.

I have wanted this to be just a test. To see what it feels like and how bad/well it could go. I certainly do not want to jump into decisions quickly. But after four hours, I am tempted to make it a reality instead of just an assessment.

But of course, the Director puts me off but the manager seems very nice. De ja vu, I tell you, cause it is the same stubbornness and old fashion that I see here. And change management is what taking place and I’ve been there all along. Do I want to spend time working with that level of stubbornness again? But of course, ultimately, the challenge lies with me in delivering what he wants and proving him wrong.

Small matter, really.

I’ve a friend, who told me “Don’t you worry about these things. Let it happen naturally, and things will fall in place. Look at me, when I got married, I didn’t thought about owning our own house, and look at me now, three kids and two cars!”

These words has comforted me so much, and I breathe a sigh of relieve and say a silent prayer to HIM to seek for his direction.

Fan switch

Mr. S: (called through the operator) Hello?
We: Reception, how can I help you?
Mr. S: How do I on the fan?
We: Well, you switch it on, sir.
Mr. S: There is no switch.
We: Yes, there is sir. Next to the light switch.
Mr. S: There is no switch.
We: Yes, there is sir. Its the round knob next to the light switch.
Mr. S: (silent) Ah, yes. There is a switch.
We: Alright, sir.
Mr. S: How do I on it?
We: You turn it clockwise, sir.
Mr. S: (silent) Okay.
We: Anything else, sir?
Mr. S: How do I off it?
We: You turn it the other way, sir.
Mr. S: Ah, ok. Thank you.

Semisonic - Closing Time

Lyrics

Okay, last one. Suddenly in a video frenzy.

Hinder - Better than Me

Lyrics

Fall Out Boy - Sugar We're Going Down

Lyrics

Sean Kingston - Beautiful Girls

Lyrics

My Chemical Romance - I Dont Love You

Lyrics

Car Park

In XYZ Hotel's lobby...

Mr. Y: Excuse me, but I cannot find my car.
We: What you mean sir?
Mr. Y: I cannot remember where I park my car.
We: Okay. Do you remember any signs or symbols or colours at the carpark? Is there any fruits or animal symbols?
Mr. Y: Err... (takes a moment to think) No, I dont think there is any symbols. But I know that when I come out of the carpark, I am at ABC Hotel's lobby.
We: ...

Roller Coaster

I'm creating a new section called "Working Life".

It documents actual conversations that took place while working here.

Of course, most contributions would be from Des, and these are many of my favourites, as told by him, followed by many laughs afterwards.

Enjoy!

Mr. X: Hello, excuse me.
We: Yes sir, how can I help you?
Mr. X: What is a roller coaster?
We: ? (Confused look)
Mr. X: (points to the brochure) Roller Coaster. What is it?
We: (cracking his brain trying to find the first answer that comes to mind and voila!) Fast train, sir!
Mr. X: Ah, I know fast train!
We: (smiled, kepala kembang for a genius answer)
Mr. X: Where it take me?
We: ...

I dont know whether writting it down makes it less hilarious.

Anyway, if this amuse you, let me know!

02/06/2007

If I want to capture the moments of my life, I need a good slim camera.
If I want to document the thoughts of my life, I need a good light laptop.
If I want to display the essence of my life, I need someone to die.

The first one would cost me about RM2k.
The second would cost me another RM7k.
The third, its tricky.

Funny how my greatest idea would involve someone's death.

Talk about being an exhibitionist.

Otherwise, life is alright now. But then again, after jinx-ing it back in March, I should have known better.

Conversations

"...I noticed that you werent as cheerful and happy since six months ago..."

I know that I am transparent, but I always forget that I am. And so, every once in a while, I'll get this reminder that I am, indeed, very transparent to others on how I am feeling inside.

"...and I want you to know that it is ok to feel this way..."

For the first time in my life, my ears hurts so much from listening to advices that I have not asked for. This is the reason why I rarely talked to others about my problems, because I know exactly what they will say and I do not want to hear it (because I know that if you come to me with a problem, I will tell you things that YOU do not want to hear, dont say I dont warn you).

"...you need to do this slowly..."

Clearly, I do not want to carry on the conversation, and at one point of time, I feel violated because I am hearing things that I ALREADY KNOW and certainly am not willing to discussed about it. However, the circumstances of the conversation is so that I could not do anything but to keep quiet hoping it will end.

"Hello there! I'm sorry, but this morning I've mistaken you for someone else..."

And so, the week carries on with lots of activities and meeting many other people. But deep inside, the conversation left a huge impact on me for the rest of the week.

"Great looking shoes!"

It doesnt help either to have salt rubbed into the wound. But I managed. And over the week, I got to know more about the people that I've met...

"She is too chirpy for my liking."

"...It belongs to my aunt."

"He actually strangled her!"

"Dont you think you are sitting to close?"

"My voice has been like that since a year ago..."

"Well, you know how it is, with our two bosses not talking to each other."

Well, honestly, I didnt feel that much better. But I am very much consoled with the fact that others are equally bogged down with issues in their life, and that I am indeed very very THANKFUL with my family and life right now.

"Regardless."

And I'd be stupid to think that I am all alone in this.

Having said that, please do not come forward and start offering me advice unless I specifically asked you for it.

12/05/2007

Hence, the start of a long break.

Took 8 days off from work, 5 offdays and 3 annual leaves. Already, its been busy since yesterday and I've got a wedding to attend tomorrow and a short trip up to Cherating next week.

Been feeling slightly down since I came down. You know how weddings depressed me. And crying in a restaurant doesnt help either. So, what could a girl do when she is feeling down, depressed and have bengkak red eyes in a shopping mall? She shops.

And after two pairs of red shoes, a three-quarter pants, a purple bohemian shirt, two tops and accesories, she felt much, MUCH better.

So much better that she is able to plan properly on what she is going to wear during the wedding.

Hopefully, the fire-engine red pumps will take away the attention that others have on her. And the RM28 dress will help her look like as elegantly fake as she can.

I can tell you for sure, this 8 days sure not enough wan.

Vaio

Just when I thought that there is absolutely no way I could afford to buy a small kucik Vaio, Sony came up with this absolutely beautiful babe and it cost LESS than the small Vaio!!!

Sigh, a 12-month installment would cost me around RM500++ a month.

How?

02/05/2007

Looking through my old files, i found this...

Good, the previous post is supposed to be very sad and depressing. But somehow it is not. And that does not go well with this cause I had wanted to put up something slow and depressing.

So, with reference to the previous entry below, here are some random ramblings...

I'm glad that my current handphone makes me reply sms slower than others cause if not, I would have type and sent out some very nasty sms and to regret doing so later.

It is very tiring to repeat myself.

It is also very exhausting to know too much.

I miss him very much suddenly.

I now have a phobia of driving behind cars when it is raining. I'd rather take the risk to speed along in heavy rain than to follow rows of cars driving at slow speed (in fear of someone deciding to suddenly break hence the repeat of history).

I had a huge headache that lasted for two days after the accident.

My eyes were bengkak from crying and lack of sleep.

Despite it all, I felt that I did what I should do and that is enough. I've put what is unimportant aside when it required me to do so. But it doesnt mean that I ignore it after it is done. I still remember and…

I used to type out my thoughts before I had a blog or whenever I do not have access to internet.

The above seems disturbing, and apparently I've never gotten around to finish it.

I dont really remember what had happened, and what transpired me to write that.

And that is a good thing right?

Cause whatever that had bothered me back then, its over and I've gotten over it.

:)